What’s left

I can’t stop dreaming sometimes. My day dreams are so real sometimes that I forget it’s a dream for a second. There’s a split of a second where I’m there and when I realize I’m really not…I STRUGGLE. It is so wonderful that realizing I’m not really there is like falling from a CLOUD. Sometimes I cannot channel this disappointment and I get frustrated.

But this bruised soul will be REBORN and START from scratch. Let’s see what I can do with the pieces and the time that’s left. Let’s see what happens with the bruises and the imperfections. I just hope that I get to taste the stage. I have savored it so many times in my head that I just want to know what it tastes for real. I play so hard my invisible piano sometimes that my ARM starts to hurt. I don’t want to be a VICTIM. If I did that, I would be no better than the rest. Yes, I completely screwed up by taking years to figure out what I already knew. Yes, I was lazy and did not discipline myself to do what I love. But it’s time to MEND my broken spirit. I wish I could know what will happen and how it will happen, but it would be no fun that way. Sometimes mending what’s bruised ends up being the greatest gift. It doesn’t hurt as much anymore. I resisted life and now I let it be.

I need music, I need words, I need passion and I need love. I’ll work on being happy and going with the flow of life and what will be left will be what shines through.

Can I go back in time? No. So let’s see what I can do with what is left of me. I have a feeling it’s beautiful and it’s BRIGHT.


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