Success

Success is not giving into what they tell you to believe in. Success is gray. Success isn’t the same for everybody. You can feel success even at your lowest point, even when you feel you can’t succeed. It surprises me how we talk of success and never stop and realize what it means to us. Sometimes we don’t even know that what we thought success was isn’t even close to what it is. Sometimes what we think this unencumbered word is isn’t even real.

For me, success is almost the lack of it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s great. I simply think it shouldn’t be thought of as much as it should be lived. It shouldn’t be worth obsessing over as much as it should the path we’re currently on. The less I think of success, the more I feel it. The more I simply enjoy who I am, the less I strive to chase. I plan, I desire and I will have it all. But it won’t be further than it should be and it won’t be brighter than it is now.

I want to rejoice in what I have and who I’ve become. I never want success to feel beyond reach because it isn’t. I want to enjoy the rain and the sun. I want to be happy with my body. I want to forgive and love no matter how many times my heart has been broken. I want to be flexible and laugh as much as humanly possible.

I want to make my peace with where I am. I want to only be me because I couldn’t be someone else even if I tried really hard. I want love and I want it now. I want pretty things and I want to travel. Wanting is as crucial as having, so long as we never forget what a success we already are. How could we possible forget? Life almost seems as though it was created for us to forget only so that we can remember all over again.

Well I’m remembering and what I found is a lot, overwhelmingly so. But it’s beautiful and it’s bright.

Success is fighting for what you believe in, letting go when you should, forgiving and letting go of ridiculous expectations. It’s always believing in love and enjoying the moment. It’s that hot cup of tea and feeling connected. It’s all the possibilities and the lack of comparison. It’s starting over and being proud of yourself. It’s questioning and letting go of that which remains unknown. It’s reading an inspiring book and knowing you’re never alone.

It changes and it should. It’s as unique as you are and it shifts and changes according to the colors and rainbows in your head.

It should only be defined by you and for you. It’s whatever makes you happy and whatever you want it to be.

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