I couldn’t commit because I could never truly see. All I could see was an abstract painting. It was enchanting and full of color but abstract nonetheless. This was my dream. It was messy, full of paint that wouldn’t dry and could be interpreted in many ways. Is it a house? Is it a man? Is it a singer or maybe even a writer? I couldn’t quite figure it out.

The dream still remains abstract but now it speaks to me. It doesn’t really tell me what it is but it tells me what to do, little by little. I rejoice in its message. I smile when I can understand one of its many shapes. I like it when it changes. Just when I think I’ve figured it out, it shifts and changes into whatever fits its unencumbered mood. It’s me; it’s you. It’s anything you want it to be.

It sends me numbers and codes. I’m not supposed to question it but trust it. I’m supposed to translate the message into whatever it wants to say. It’s not about me in the end; it’s about everybody. Yes, I get to enjoy it but it’s never just about me. It’s about connecting and transmitting what I believe it’s all about.

Oh, it is a beautiful mess but some people never even get to admire beautiful art and I do. I admire it and it speaks to me. The painting is hanging on the wall and it’s glorious.

I couldn’t commit because I couldn’t understand. I wasn’t sure what its purpose was, so I didn’t take it quite seriously but now I can see. I must commit even if I cannot make sense of it all. I must commit to what feels right and all the colors that fly in and out of me. I must commit to the light and the darkness and all that’s in between.

Funny how we condemn what we do not understand but what we must know is that we’re not supposed to. If we knew it all, what’s the point? If it all completely made sense, would we really be that happy? I want to be happy with what I know and what I don’t know. I want to rejoice in the sheer beauty of what is meant to be abstract. So much room is left for interpretation; the sky is no longer the limit, the universe is.

Swim in the paint, swallow the letters, and rejoice in the moment. Live through what matters and smile back at the artist that keeps you alive. Sing that song and paint a picture. You might not know what it is but you know how it makes you feel and that’s all you need to commit and to believe that it isn’t just real, it’s what matters most.


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