Where I am

I crave nothing anymore. But having wanting everything for so long, it makes it difficult to let go of. I might not be completely where I want to be but I’m certainly further along than I was a year ago. That’s easy to forget.

I tend to easily want more. I tend to easily compare myself to others and I tend to easily question the past. I’m trying to love where I am; I’m trying to create a world that makes more sense.

We are here, wherever here is. We made decisions and we are where we are. I always wonder of what could have been but there is no point in that. All I have is here and all I can work with is here. I’m tired of wasting time; I’m tired of questioning the way things are. It feels as though it’s a lost battle. It’s a battle without where no one can win.

I want to make the most of what I have and where I am. I want to be accepting. Yes, there are goals to accomplish, dreams to catch and people to love. But for now, there are moments to be accepted and embraced.

And if where I am isn’t good enough, let’s simply create a place that is more beautiful, with more trees and creatures that make no sense to others, but are oddly beautiful to us.

Where I am is here and here should be good enough. Where I am is unexpected and that should be fine. Where I am is not knowing why I haven’t fought for my dreams hard enough and being OK with that. I’m also standing alone and ready to let go of what my very programmed head thinks could have done better.

Something’s missing here and I’m not sure what it is. I have felt it before, some sort of intuition that tells me something is coming, that something is out there for me to grab. I’m ready to find it and take it. I’m ready to bring it with me and continue the path that makes complete sense.

Look around and enjoy where you are. Look around and embrace it. Life flies by and letting it all in is the greatest decision. Even if it’s not perfect, take it in. And if what’s around you isn’t enough, leave. If you want to see more, go see more. Save and go. It shouldn’t be as complicated as most people think it is.

I am here and I am happy. I want to see more so I’ll work towards seeing more. I want to love so I’ll love whatever is worth loving, including myself. I’m here and here is where I long to be.


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