I have been selfish in the past, sometimes I still am. Today is my one-year anniversary of living in a beautiful, well-preserved Spanish Baroque influenced city in the Central America. All I can feel is gratitude. It has given me the opportunity to come back to life. It might not be perfect, but it’s magical and full of opportunities.
I have fallen in love, fallen in lust, gotten jobs, had my heart horribly broken, lost weight, enjoyed the company of authentic friends, taught, celebrated, laughed and cried. It has been fantastic and yet challenging. But I have learned to live life. I have learned to be happy with what I have. I have found the way to do what feels right and almost completely let go of everything else. I have understood how to care but not suffer.
And I have come to understand that if you can’t do it for yourself, you should do it for another. Do it to help them out someday. Do it so that they don’t give up in whatever odd path they find themselves in. You have no idea how much it’ll mean. I sometimes wonder what went wrong and if I could have done something differently but then I remember there’s nothing to regret and that I’m never really alone. We’re all in this together. I get a feeling that someone is going through the exact same situation and then I share and feel better.
Without directly knowing how, I know the struggle and the fight will be well worth it. I’m grateful for what I’ve lived through, for the wonderful people I’ve met and the sights and sounds that have pulled me back here another year.
Because of it, I am inspired to keep writing, to keep believing and know that whatever is meant to be, will be. I believe that more than ever. It’s hard to let go, but whatever is yours, no one else can have. So, when it comes to choosing passion; do it for you and do it for another. This living thing makes more sense if we stick together. The consequence of that choice for me has been peace. And peace is the greatest thing I’ve ever experienced. If you know you’re not alone, you’ll realize there’s nothing to worry about and that there’s nothing to lose.