Where am I?

I wake up again, lost. This time I’m older but not necessarily wiser. I’m faced with the same decision. Should I stay or should I go? Will I ever figure it out? The different shades of grey seem to make the gap between black and white grow further apart. Little did I know about this living situation when I was younger.

The dilemma is not knowing. Should I try to fit into the box in order to maybe someday fly or should I take a trip on a rocket ship where the sea is the sky? The fantasy lures me in but it has also betrayed me in the past. Or should I put out the fire of being free and make my life grow inside the box?

If I came up to myself, what would I tell me to do? Important question that should be answered. I think I’d tell myself, first of all, to relax. Nothing should be worth betting my peace. No matter what I decide, I must know that my future is full of happiness and fulfillment. I don’t see myself fitting the profile but I do see myself feeling free and stable. I’m always caught between these two world and which one wins is still yet to be seen.

I wake up again, I’m not home. I feel restless and lose my breath as I remember where I am…which is nowhere. The walls close in on me and with every passing minute I push them away, I have survived another day.

Whatever world wins, I’ll be the hero of the story…I’ll be the one that gets the happy endings and beginnings against all odds.

I wake up again, I feel lonely and lost; but that doesn’t mean someday somehow I won’t find my way.

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